Top Four Reasons Why I Would Leave A Party–And Tout De Suite!

19 Apr

Los Angeles is a mecca for party-goers. There’s always something happening in this crazy town, from the Hollywood Hills to the coastline. However, increasingly, I’ve noticed that parties that I’ve been to have been good only half the time. Unfortunately, 50% of the time, I’m walking to my car thinking, “Why the feck did I pull out my best sequin dress for this bullshiz?”

So from a veteran partygoer to you, here are surefire cues that signal the end of a party. I would leave:


If People Only Want To Talk Money.
Money. Who wants to talk about it? You either have it, or you don’t. I don’t have stunningly large amounts of it. But people talking shop about investments when everyone else is bored out of their mind listening is a surefire reason to get out. No one wants to hear about how much of a return you made last quarter. Really. No one wants to hear about that. No seriously, guys, talking about money is really not the way to get laid. Unless you want to attract the wrong kind of girl, in which case, have fun with her and try to make sure she doesn’t only want you for the leather lining in your BMW.


If People Are Staring At Their Mobiles A Bit Too Much.
I will admit that I am the first one to check my Blackberry, and recently I was at a party where we were all going mobile-heavy, but had a great time nonetheless, with no one leaving before 1am. Seriously, though, I’ll be the first to head towards Twitter, Plurk, Facebook and e-mail when a party is dead. If I see other people relying on their mobiles a bit too much, then I’ll wrap up convos, and say goodbyes. Taking photos of your fellow revellers with your phones or exchanging numbers is understandable party phone usage, but anything else is an indicator not to hang out waiting for the party to end.


If The Drunk Girl Makes A Break For The Bathroom.
There’s always one person, usually a girl, who can’t hold her liquor. And though she may have just been fawning over a fellow partygoer, or dancing on the grand piano, there always comes a point where she can, in a split second, blurt out: “‘Scuse me!” and make a break for the bathroom. There’s nothing quite like that to serve as a mood killer.


If You’re Just Plain Fecking Bored And Done.
I have been at the most hoity toitiest of parties that were ultimately boring, with hosts that do nothing to make everyone welcome. Time was that I would wait around in the hopes that things improve, but experience dictates that things never improve. A few weeks ago, while at a more VIP party at one of this cities’ otherwise greatest bars, I did not even last for two hours. I gave out some of my cards, shook enough hands, but eventually, at only just about midnight, I told my two friends that I was there with that I was done. It wasn’t the people, necessarily, and the drinks are always great, it was just…boring.


One Response to “Top Four Reasons Why I Would Leave A Party–And Tout De Suite!”


  1. Two Los Angelenos Ladies Serenely Discuss the State of The Bars In Los Angeles. « pas de deux - 26 April 2009

    […] where they work, and sometimes how much money they make, right away. LoveMeDeux: This goes back to my number 1 reason to leave a party. Oh, I think it’s interesting to know where they work, what they do. That’s all fine. […]

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